In everyday life – a good question to ask yourself is:
“What can I control and what is out of my control?”
We may not be able to control some situations but we are responsible for how we react or respond to them. Reacting and responding are not the same. Start by asking yourself in which way you reply? Do you get defensive? Can others read your emotions by your facial expression? Do you get emotional or out of control? If so, you are a reacting to a situation, negatively. Responding is a slower, logical response. Responding, therefore, leads to changing the direction of a conflict or finding a productive solution.
Oh how I long to be less reactive and more responsive. I can’t say that I am very good at that but I can say that I have gotten better over the years. I have been more intentional and putting forth the effort. I have slowed down and counted to 3. I have learned to apologize. I have prayed a lot.
And I have to because I am raising kids who will one day be adults, spouses, parents, and employees.
I have to because it is good for my health.
I have to because it is good for my relationships.
Becoming more aware of how we handle situations makes us stronger individually, more engaged with our relationships and more productive altogether. Being mindful of our responses begins with learning self control. We can’t be in control of everything around us but we can be in control of our responses.
What we can control:
I can’t be the only who struggles with this. I hope to have given encouragement to others like me, that we can work on our responses and see positive change happen. We have to.