Some ladies and I at church are reading this book called, I Love Me, I Love Me Not… and it has been a wonderful reminder of how our self esteem can be affected by our relationships. The number one relationship that can build our self-confidence is our relationship with God. How can we “be imitators of me as I am of Christ”, as Paul says in 1 Cor 11:1, if we have low opinions of ourselves and don’t reflect the joy and confidence that we have through Christ?
We can grow in our confidence, not because of who we are or what we’ve done, but because of what God can do with our lives when we commit to Him.
So how can we improve our relationships with God?
In the author’s study, 90% of women who rated their self esteem as high, engaged in personal prayer and Bible study daily, or at least several times a week. There is a connection between our study habits and our self esteem. This begins with working on our relationship between ourselves and God which requires examining ourselves and breaking barriers that may be hindering our growth. Is it sin that we need to deal with? We can ask for God’s help and His forgiveness. Is it depending on self rather than God? We shouldn’t be so worrisome or have a lack of faith if we are fully relying on God. Or maybe it is our ‘busyness’. Not making time for our personal relationships with our families or our spouses makes the relationships suffer or causes divorce, the same is true for God.
If we want to break our barriers, we have to pray and ask for God’s help. Establishing communication with God is required just as it is with our other relationships. Rosemary even indicates that good communication requires good listening skills. Ouch! How much of that are we doing? Do we hunger and thirst after righteousness (Matthew 5:6)? We should be setting aside time to strengthen our relationship in ways by reading the word, listening to Christian podcasts/radio, sing songs in worship, go to church when the doors are open, and we need to have friends that will encourage us and grow with.
1. Decide what you want to study.
-specific topics, book in the Bible, review sermon notes
2. Set aside a time of the day for study and prayer.
-getting up earlier, cutting out tv, finding a quiet place
3. Learn to use small amounts of time wisely.
-pray while driving, vacuuming, washing hair, etc.
4. Organize prayer requests into list.
-write it down to remember specific requests and thank God for answered prayers.
If we build our relationships with God, our self esteem will continue to increase and mature. We have to begin to rely on Him, and less on ourselves. When we begin to feel good about ourselves because we are in the right relationship with Him, we become confident in our faith, giving ourselves peace and security, and allowing ourselves to see Him as our source of wisdom and strength.